the amount of crap i have is mind boggling. like really. i mean i know
im a pack rat. but really its crazy. like just now ( actually for a
while now) ive been planning on doing a blog about my move. i took
pictures of my apt a day or two after i decided to move. i wanted proof
that i lived alone and could visit said proof when i go possibly crazy
in minco oklahoma. so just now i was like camera cord where are
you??!!!?? and i had to plug in 3 different USB cords before i found
the right one. seriously. and this place is not soo messy now ( i mean
cuz at this point what is in my apt is either going to move with me. or
is going into the trash. i had about 15 plastic totes of crap that was
put into storage at my sisters shed outside her house....i mean this is
wonderful stuff i can not let go but cant live with in a small X small
room in my mothers house. i mean i dont want to scare you. i dont think
my apt was every too messy/scary/pack.rat.packed or anything. but why
do i keep shit i dont need ie. camera cords from cameras that have not
made the cut ( currently in a trash pile somewhere wheverever the trash
goes) and for my own defense these said cameras that have gone to
camera heaven were just tossed recently. so i havent had time to figure
out what goes to new cameara and what has passed on.

anways. really. why do i need to keep shit i dont need? i have tossed
soo much stuff lately. but still i got lots i need to get rid of. i am
proud of myself tho. ive been really good at cutting the fat soo to
speak.

gesh. and all i wanted to do was to post some pictures.

the amount of crap i have is mind boggleing. like really. i mean i know
im a pack rat. but really its crazy. like just now ( actually for a
while now) ive been planning on doing a blog about my move. i took
pictures of my apt a day or two after i decided to move. i wanted proof
that i lived alone and could visit said proof when i go possibly crazy
in minco oklahoma. so just now i was like camera cord where are
you??!!!?? and i had to plug in 3 different USB cords before i found
the right one. seriously. and this place is not soo messy now ( i mean
cuz at this point what is in my apt is either going to move with me. or
is going into the trash. i had about 15 plastic totes of crap that was
put into storage at my sisters shed outside her house....i mean this is
wonderful stuff i can not let go but cant live with in a small X small
room in my mothers house. i mean i dont want to scare you. i dont think
my apt was every too messy/scary/pack.rat.packed or anything. but why
do i keep shit i dont need ie. camera cords from cameras that have not
made the cut ( currently in a trash pile somewhere wheverever the trash
goes) and for my own defense these said cameras that have gone to
camera heaven were just tossed recently. so i havent had time to figure
out what goes to new cameara and what has passed on.

anways. really. why do i need to keep shit i dont need? i have tossed
soo much stuff lately. but still i got lots i need to get rid of. i am
proud of myself tho. ive been really good at cutting the fat soo to
speak.

gesh. and all i wanted to do was to post some pictures.

so im moving to minco. mostly for financially reason. i want to be able
to save some money and to pay some stuff off ( school that i still owe
703840380 dollars for. well not that much. but might as much be how lil
im paying at a time :/ ) so financially this is an awesome move. not
sure how mentally i will take it. hah i love my family and i miss them.
but im moving into a wayy smaller place. and having my mom as my
roommate when i have lived alone for the over the past 2 years ( and i
f.ing love it!!!) is going to be a big change.

its going to be a great time to purge ( anyone wear size 10-11 shoes??
hah) and get rid of stuff that i dont use. dont like. or just dont
need. period.

my mom called me today to tell me my brother in law will be able to
move my big stuff this weekend. this weekend??!! gah! i cant complain
really hes going to move my heavy stuff and i hate moving lil stuff
hah. so when we get done this weekend i will have my computer desk and
my bed. i can take my desk apart to move. and my bed isnt going. im
downsizing to a twin :(

i have thought this though pretty hard. and it seems like to be the
best move for me. i just hope my friends dont forget about me. and will
really let me crash on their couch or extra bed if i need too heh :) i
know i will need have drinks and time with my girls if i dont want to
go crazyyyy heh :)

soo i must get to packing. gah!

soo i have fell hard in love with lady gaga. i started looking up her
stuff on youtube. watching her videos and wow i just love her. i love
her music and her crazy style. and most of all she can really sing!
like really! im soo excited for her new cd coming out. i will prob
actually buy it. you can get a double cd that has her first cd and this
one together for like 15 bucks i will prob get that. soo excited.
hi. im a nerd!

<3

i do feel guilty.

when i grow up i want to be...im not sure. but this is not it. go back
to school? maybe. move into a box that doenst charge rent? possbily (
how else would i be able to pay for school??!!?) work 40 hrs a week and
go to school? ( great. i dont have a social life now. if i do this will
i ever. again?)

and what do i want to be?? heck if i know. i know id like to make close
to what i make now ( i could do less if i liked my job more. which heck
thats why i think im having a 1/3 life crisis.) i want to be able to
plan for things and do them. not hope oh heck i hope i can have this
day off. or this night off. or i will know what i work. or will asked
nicely to change my schedule. i just want to like my job more i guess.

blahh! i just wish i knew what i need to do. and i would take the steps
i needed. i guess im scared.

i wrote an email to my mom telling her my frustrations in my job and
the other mgrs i work with. i wish i could be as positve as her.

GM :)
Work, is work. If it were fun, it would be called that. And I know you
are supposed to like your job? I like my job but it is still work.
There are Buffy Tesios everywhere. People are just people. We need to
stay close to the ones who encourage us and distance ourselves from
those who do not. I just try to take a positive attitude into it all.
That is the only way to be happy, from the inside out. Those two ladies
are sad cases. I think people who dis others to make them selves feel
better are very unhappy. I want to be happy. That comes from within. We
have that happiness, they do not. Anyway, you have good friends and you
have your very small family and you have Tess. What more could you ask
for? And you are fairly healthy which is very important. Just take care
of you and try to be helpful. Some people just hate it when you are
nice to them. So I try to be nice and if they are really mean, I try to
stay out of their radar. But you know all this. You are mature enough
not to waste your time on the really stupid people. I sorta want to
just live in a cave but we are supposed to make the world a better
place. You would not make it in the cave unless you had wifi :) So,
don’t worry, be happy :) And what you do in your spare time is YOUR
business. I bet if they confessed how they spend their spare time, we
could make fun of them.
Don’t you hate me :) I love you!!! It has been such beautiful weather,
I love it.


this is one of the only emails that she has sent in the last couple of
days that didnt say holler back. really she says that in emails. shes
silly.


The lyrics to Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen, by Mary Schmich:

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists,
whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own
meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But
trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you
and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed
your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle
Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people
who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes
you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with
yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in
doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life.
The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted
to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I
know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when
they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe
you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't
congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices
are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of
what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever
own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should
hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle,
because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you
when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in
Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will
philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize
that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund.
Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one
might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will
look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply
it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing
the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts
and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

i cant remember when i stumbled across explodingdog.com i know it was
when i working at IT at OU but thats all i know. i visit this site
pretty often. and i love this artist.

im really liking lady gaga. only 534038 years behind everyone else. oh
whatever. i dont listen to the radio. ever.

oh. my. god. i love fonts. love them! and dafont! to bad my photoshop
cs will expire in like 12 days. i think i can just move a copy from one
of my ibooks. i hope.

why dont i sleep like a normal person. possibly because my dreams are
soo much better then my real life. waking up in painful and makes sleep
not worth it for the way i feel after an amazing dream. life hurts me
sometimes. is there something wrong with me? maybe. am i normal? not in
any way im sure.


.....

and its excatlly how i have been fealing latley when i go to sleep.


When I look up from my pillow
I dream you are there with me
Though you are far away
I know you'll always be near to me

I go to sleep
And imagine that you're there with me
I go to sleep
And imagine that you're there with me

I look around me
And feel you are ever so close to me
Each tear that flows from my eye
Brings back memories of you to me

I go to sleep
And imagine that you're there with me
I go to sleep
And imagine that you're there with me

I was wrong, I will cry
I will love you till the day I die
You were all, you alone and no one else
You were meant for me

When morning comes again
I have the loneliness you left me
Each day drags by
Until finally my time descends on me

I go to sleep
And imagine that you're there with me
I go to sleep
And imagine that you're there with me

just got done watching serenity for the 750384038 times. its one of my
favorite movies for many reasons. joss whedon. scifi that isnt too over
my head. comedy. fighting. all stuff lindy loves.

well my weekend off has basically been me being super lazy. i have
played alot of katamari damacy and spent wayyyy tooo much time on
facebook. and played with miss tess. at this moment she is sitting on
my chest wondering why i love this silly light.making.noise.making box
soo much :) she doesnt like technology much. she would rather lick my
face and get her belly scratched. oh the life of a doggie. must be
nice. hah.

i changed the look of this thing. not sure if i like the
underwear.wearing.girl soo much but it will do for now. id like to make
my own header and have looked into that a lil bit. but i lost interest.
like soo many other things i plan on doing but never do. like this
fancy mac has the whole adobe creative suite and will expire in 30 days
and i have only opened some stuff up to go ohhhh fancy. then i go do
something else. i wish i had the drive i need to be more creative. i
waste my brain wayyy too much :(

back to work in the morning. i work a crappy 12 to 8 tom. and im sure i
will have to stay till 9 or 10 to get my full 40 hrs this week since my
boss is horrible at making schedules. ( scheduling us till 11 and we
always leave before 10.30. meaning i useally have 2 to 4 hrs i have to
make up somewhere. and she doesnt like us to come in early. at all.
stupid. stupid. stupid. ) and then 3 to 11 the rest of the week. and i
work mornings this weekend. soo no halloween drinking for mes :( oh
well i really cant afford it. i either need to make more money or have
to pay for less stuff. not sure how to do either. hah.

dear blog

i find all this sign in with your google crap annoying. first off i
dont have an google email. or any of the lil things you want me to sign
on with. i have a blogger. yet everyone seems to use this thing to
follow people.

i confused.

and not that anyone reads this silly stuff anyways. but i do read other
peoples. but following these said people would be alot easier then
having 573048308408 blogger bookmarks everywhere.

please help a girl out.

love

i.spend.alot.of.time.on.the.interweb.but.apparently.still.get.confused.by.simple.to.other.people.things.girl.
or lindy for short.


ps if you are friends with the new facebook live feed thing i get why
you are confusing. and i may never figure out :( and i dont like either
of you verrry much!!!! :p

dear vaseline sheer infusion lotion. i am sooo in love with you i might
never use another lotion again. how do you do it? you make my hands
feel soft ( even tho i wash them 573048308480 times a day at work) and
you stay on after i wash my hands. amazing. if you had a lil head i
would kiss the top of it. but you dont since you are just a bottle of
lotion. but dont feel bad about that cuz you are the most amazing
lotion i know. love lindy.c.

slept less then 4 hours tuesday nite.

went to be around 3am last night.

woke up around 8.45 this morning.

laid in bed and tried to fall asleep while i petted tess till 9.20.
finally got out of bed. and now here i am. wanting oatmeal and some oj.
and i have neither of those things. soo im settling for icewater and
air? hah. i do have some mt.dew that i can drink. but since i drank
enough caffeine yesterday to power a small ocean liner for more then a
day i think i will lay off the OTC.crack for today.

im soon making my weekly/bi.weekly trek to minco to wash clothes and
marvel at how much my nephew has grown in since i last saw him. im also
going to be getting my "new" mac from my mom. hopefully is not
prehistoric and runs okay. and if it has a dvd player ( if it doesnt im
going to keep the pc she found me) i will be able to run 10.5 and since
both my ibooks are running
10.not.high.enough.to.even.download.new.itunes.songs.cuz.gahhh.your.os.is.old.
this will be an AWESOME upgrade. :)

reese called me randomly last nite and stopped by to give me the cutest
planner ever that she found for me at barnes and noble. and we then
went to target. i love her so much she can stand me when im crashing
off of my caffeine high and tweeking on my mucinex d high. hah. i will
miss our little random outtings if i move to minco. but i know i will
be in norman alot. i love it here. i just want to be closer to my
family.

well off to clean dirty socks and moving small electronics i go!

<3

check check... 1..2..1.2.3. 53o43080843!

ummm working now????

whatsup journal?

i suck. and i dont post much. even tho i visit often. i love visiting oour.apartments and vintage ads. but i just dont post at all. why is that. im not sure. i want to post. i want to have some type of collection of what the heck i do day to day. and for this i blame face book. dude i spend wayyyyy to much time on there. its like crack. i mean if i ever did crack im sure it would be close.

anyways.

i have no lease. i havent had one on my apt since the end of may. i went and talked the girls that work in the apt office and they told me for sure my rent would go up. at least a good 50 bucks. meaning my rent would be over 500 bucks. pretty fucking ridiculous. i looked at some apts for fear of this price increase. i mean shit. i dont have a washer or dryer ( or a place to hook them up i should say) and my bathroom is in my bedroom. not that its a big deal. but i dont really like it. i found a place i liked. and it was cheaper then what i pay now. bigger. and a bit nicer. and with w/d hookups. but moving. and deposits. and pet deposits. and changing from OGE to that other electric comp i cant think of. gah. well the good news is my rent hasnt gone up. but im living here without a lease. i mean i pay my rent but it kinda makes me nervous to not have one. why i dont know. and i have this fear that i will wake up tomorrow with a note on my door telling me i have to get a new lease and with that a shiny.new.upgraded.rent.amount.

there is a place i want to move into. but at this moment someone else is living there. its a loft that is in the backyard/behind reese's house. i would love love love to live there. but i dont know when the girl ( no one does) is going to move or live there forever. right now its 500 bucks a month. all bills included. and it has a backyard that i would share with reese. meaning tess could have a place to play leash free :) its soo cute. and too good to be true. cuz well i cant move in there :(

so minco.


ive thought about moving there on and off again. my mom has offered for me to move in with her to save money. or to pay off what money i have borrowed for school. and to pay off my car earlier. which would be nice. but since ive lived alone for a while. i got lotso shit. and her place. or the room i would get is pretty fricking small.

so living alone in minco.

rent would be cheap there. when i had my apt there it was less then 250 a month. and my apt was huge. but those are no longer available. im sure i could find a house. my mom pays 275 for her 2 bedroom house. ( which i wouldnt probably get that lucky) but still. wow. if i could get a 2 bedroom for under 500 bucks i would be happy. tho id like to stay in the 300-400 range so i would be saving money. water costs more. and my elect for a house might be a lil more. so i think it will be about anywhere from a 100 to 200 bucks difference. and since my fam lives there i would drive out there less. which would save on gas but my commute to work would be about 10 minutes longer a day and its all highway ( not sure if thats better or worse mpg wise) but i would prob eat with them more. meaning saving more money. but im not sure. money isnt the biggest deal really. i mean id like to save money. the most important thing would be being closer to my family. and closer to dustin. hes already one. i may never have children of my own and i hate to miss him growing up. and tess would have a back yard. and well it would just be nice to be close to my family since i the older i get the less i spend with my friends. ( going out and such) and since none of them are single really. the ones i hang out with most. i dont hang out with them all that much. and since my car isnt a piece. like my tbird was when i lived in minco before . not that that ever stopped me from driving back and forth all the time. i wouldnt mind. cuz i really dont mind the drive.


gahh! i dont know. im not sure. i dont know what i want to do.



i just dont know.

i guess i will just think about it more.

and more
and more.

and maybe i will figure it out.

maybe.

things have been strange.

work is the sucks now i have moved to the tri.city store. i dont think anyone there really likes me. and i work harder then i have in a long time to prove im good at what i do with most of the time it not even showing off.

i was without ac for almost a week. it was horrible. i have an awesome rash that is almost gone away. thank the gods. and tons of mosquito bites. it wouldnt have been soo bad other then me only have one window and my french doors that open. and tess barking at everything. i bought ear plugs after the third night. im going to need some mederma to get rid of all the mosquito bite scars :(

i got a new phone. its sooo nice. im in love with it. ive gotten several tokidoki themes for it. and a back shell for it. tokidoki is like hello kitty on crack! i loves it! :)

i have to be at work at 730 tom and sunday. i hate working mornings :( i guess maybe if i worked them more then once or twice every two weeks i might get use to it. but the working 2 to 11 inbetween opening shifts does a number on my sleeping habits.

ps

im currently addicted to farm.town on facebook. go me.

i will stop abandoning you i promise.

sooo im really lusting after a new phone. or a new sidekick actually. ive had my sidekick ID for almost two fricking years!

i feel bad about spending the money tho. what if i need something? i really need to get an oil change on my car. and maybe pay off some more of my doc bills. but in the last month ive had to superglue parts of my phone back on. and what if i break it when i have NO money. then i will have NO phone. unless i dig out the nokia hello kitty phone that i just keep cuz well its hello kitty. i cant imagine tapping out txts. i would die. esp now since i send anywhere from 2000 to 3000 a month. gah!

they have 2 sidekicks right now. i can get one for 79.99 or the newest one for 179.99. both isnt bad. but my bill will be due in 2 weeks and its 80 bucks soo either way im giving tmo 200 to 300 bucks this month. ouch. i like the cheaper one cuz you can change the shells. outside. to lots of different cool shells. but they are 15 bucks a pop. and the 179 one has 3G capabilities but as far as i see on the site we dont even have that in many if few spots in ok. but would could have more in the future. and well the more expensive one is wayyy nicer. faster. cooler. but again more expensive.

gesh. idk. i just need a new phone.

i just feel bad about spending the money like i said. one reason being. or 3 actually. i just got my cable turned back on.yayy! this alone should make me happy. anndd i got a coach hand.me.down purse. that i friggin love. and it super nice. ANNNDD my sister gave me a brand.frickin.new ipod shuffle. i mean it hadnt been open or anything. which is nice since my ipod runs on my ibook. which is slow. and well if importing on it is like a nite long ordeal. and now i can move stuff back and forth on the shuffle using my pc. (what im using right now) soo really i should be happy with all this new stuff ive gotten in the last week. but i still want a new phone :/

i should be happy. but im not. soo is my life.

i need to download a client for lj. but i have no idea what is better.

and i also lost my paid account today. im not going to pay for it again until i get back into using it. it just seems like a waste.

went to work at 10. to be told at 12.30 that i needed to leave and come back at 4.30 to close. yay. :(

its my weekend off. or it was going to be. i have no idea whats going on.

god facebook is a time suck.

i just looked at the new moon site. omgs! im such a nerd.

im looking for a new email addy since i dont want to pay another 100 bucks to mac.com to keep my lindyc at mac.com one. but lindyc is taken at everything. i guess i will have to use firstarout. balls!!!